Truth and Dying
by deathcurse
Summary: *Emily, you must be hurt badly…to delude yourself into thinking that this counts as a hug from the girl you love…* Ariadne Knight Emily's hidden thoughts about Yue during the Magical World Arc, with spoilers for chapter 277.


**WARNING: Spoilers for Negima Chapter 277, and a tragedy warning…you have been warned! =)**

**Truth and Dying**

_ "CLASS REP!"_

I couldn't remember if I had screamed, but I definitely heard Yue shouting my name as my knees gave out. Ruining my uniform was definitely worth it when I fell forward and felt Yue catch me, her arms wrapped tightly against me to keep me from hitting the ground.

_Emily_, I thought to myself wryly, _you must be hurt badly…to delude yourself into thinking that this counts as a hug from the girl you love…_

I heard Bea shouting "Ojou-sama!" in the distance, along with the more alarming sound of the black metallic droid's laser charging up again for a second shot.

Desperately, I grabbed at Yue's arm but she was faster, throwing both of us back and defiantly shielding me with her body. It shouldn't be that way…I'm the one who's supposed to be protecting her…I'm the class representative.

I'm the older one, the more experienced one…but Yue's more powerful than I am, I know it. I think I've known it since I first saw her, and so I lied all the harder because I was scared that she was better than I was. If it was one thing my family has taught me well, it was how to never tell the truth about the things that matter most to you.

The gunslinger destroyed the droid, the explosion slamming Yue into me as bits of shrapnel sprayed into the air.

Yue held me so tightly against her I could feel her pounding heartbeat echoing into my body.

I remembered Yue saving my life from the griffin dragon, and how she seemed so beautiful and so sure in being the hero. Every time she felt strongly about something I could see her expression change so candidly, as if she wasn't used to being honest and expressive about her emotions. Such the opposite of myself—I hid myself under shallow tantrums and boasting so well that only Beatrice could read what I really felt underneath. In that instant when Yue called upon her Artefact and faced down the dragon with that powerful confidence on her face, I knew that I had fallen in love.

Fallen in love with a human girl, who was a near stranger to me, who was my rival…this utterly unsuitable girl who had captured my interest no matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise. Ayase Yue.

"Yue-san…" I whispered, lost somewhere between the past and the present.

"Class rep! Are you alright?" Yue cried out, pulling away to look at my face.

It took me a moment to answer—very immaturely, I was torn between dejection that she was no longer pressed up against me, and delight that I could see her lovely face. Her hands on my waist were hot through my uniform, and I forced my eyes to open to look at her squarely, trying to smile.

"Ahah…it was only a scratch…it doesn't even hurt…" I lied. Without looking, I knew that the blast had burned me badly, but the pain didn't matter as much as the knowledge that Yue was unhurt and the fact that she was still holding me, the closest we've been together since our battle with the dragon.

"No…you're just not feeling the pain out of shock!" Yue exclaimed, still so smart and logical even when there was pandemonium around us. I've never seen her so frantic, so troubled…more often _I _was the one fretting and shouting about something while she only gave me a bored expression in return (something that only fondly infuriated me all the more when I was in mid-rant). But I was oddly calm now, simply smiling back at her while lying through my teeth.

My mother had showed me how to lie to the ones you love. She would come home late at night, and lie to me with such an honest face that I would believe her, even when I had grown out of childhood. The only thing she said to me when I came to her crying one day was, "You shouldn't have told her what you really felt. When people know your truths, they can turn your own heart on you. And there would be nothing you can do to stop them."

Thank you mother, for making me into someone who can lie without thinking, who had won the admiration of all my classmates for being noble, haughty and mysterious…for being the fantasy that they all wanted me to be. I didn't hate myself, but I always knew that I wasn't someone to be admired. I wasn't the kind of person who burned with bravery and painful honesty, someone who unknowingly was the best of all of us.

The kind of person I knew to treasure…

Yue stared at me, shocked, her eyes wide and searching. "Why?! Why would you put yourself in danger to protect the likes of me?"

What a silly girl…

This wonderful, brave and clever girl…

"Well, if you will always be such a dullard…" I managed to say, feeling a soft, affectionate smile come onto my lips. Sweat dripped down my face—Yue was right, shock had blocked most of the pain… "Honestly…" The words came out of me unaltered, each word painful and raw and lined with honest emotion. "What am I going to do with you…?"

It was almost funny, how only at the end of my life could I finally manage to be truthful.

From the amazed blush on Yue's face, I knew that she could hear the subtext in my voice. Those bright eyes glittered with awe and shock as she stared at me, a stunned whisper escaping from her open mouth. "Class rep…"

I wish she could say my name. Hers was so beautiful on my tongue…

A hot flash shot through both of us, and I gasped, feeling my head snap back. Yue's amazement turned into surprise, then dawning horror.

I saw glowing petals drift into my field of vision…the same kind of petals that had filled the room earlier when the droids first attacked. Anguish filled my heart until I realized that only I was getting ripped apart, not Yue—then I could let my tension slip away for the last time.

As long as she was safe, my last moments could be full of all the love I had for her and not a dreadful fear that I couldn't be there to protect her anymore.

Yue was cupping my face desperately, shaking, her face pale and full of the same anguish that I no longer felt. "Cl…"

I had to hear her name on my lips one last time. "Yu…" The buzzing agony had spread up my chest and neck, cutting off my breath. All I could feel were her hands on my cheeks and see the tragic dismay in her violet eyes.

I love her.

My eyes closed, and I felt something warm brush against my lips before everything faded away into soft darkness.

* * *

_**Author's Note: Emily's death in Chapter 277 broke my heart, and this was before I even knew anything about her. And I just knew that I had to write something about it...**_

_**Translations of dialogue were taken from .**_

_**I made up a lot of Emily's family details, since as far as I know there's nothing to contradict it...I wanted to try and give Emily a reason for acting in such a tsundere manner towards Yue in the beginning, and yet why there was such a tender scene when she died.**_

_**Emily x Yue fans, unite! =D Drop me a review?? =) **_


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